July 25, 2011

BTH: Week Four

My positive picture for the week:

I went to the Garfield Park Conservatory on Saturday since it was the first day of their annual honey sale - they have hives there and sell their honey as a fundraiser since admission to the Conservatory is free. It's a bit expensive but very delicious and a jar lasts me all year since I only use it in my tea, and it's a great local cause. It's especially important this year because most of the Conservatory is currently closed - we had a big hailstorm about a month ago and the glass roof of the antique building was shattered in a lot of places. This is the first time I've been back since the incident, and it was pretty sad to see. Luckily, the outdoor gardens are still thriving.


I liked the variety of colors, between the blue stone walkway, my loud yellow skirt, and my green umbrella (it's been raining a lot here lately, on and off).

What have you done this week towards your goals?

This week, I worked on goal #3 - stop following the rules. Stanier's explanation of this is as follows:
With the exception of gravity, almost all of the rules are negotiable, someone just makes them up. It's no longer about what you can't do, it's about what you can do.
With blogging, I've set a lot of rules for myself. With very few exceptions, I've had a post every day at 7:30 a.m. for nearly a year. Due in part to recent events, it's starting to feel like a stressful chore instead of something I love and look forward to. So as an early rebirthday present to myself, I'm going to cut back on posting. To start with, I'll be taking Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays off. I'll see how it goes after a week, then proceed from there. I can't quit for good - I *do* love it, and I need the accountability. But for now, this is what I need to do to preserve my sanity a little.

What did you do to make yourself feel fabulous?

This week's good feelings are two-fold. First, I stood up for my principles and broke up with Matt - surprisingly incredibly hard, but I need to trust that it was the right thing to do. And second, in the aftermath, I have not binged yet. I can't make promises for tomorrow or even five minutes from now, but in this moment, I'm being strong and choosing to feel my emotions and not eat them.

Do you exercise? What is your favourite kind and why?

I love being active in general - I used to be so lazy, and now it feels like I can never sit still. I think my favorite is running - after years of being so sedentary, I feel incredibly powerful every time I push myself forward, mile after mile. I like that running can make my worries disappear for a while (nothing relieves stress like stomping down your feet for an hour), and I like that it can be done alone, with a friend, or with a crowd. I like racing, because it makes me feel like a well-rounded individual: I was always The Brainy Kid, but racing makes me feel like an athlete. Every finish line feels amazing, but the fact that I even cross the starting lines never fails to make me feel like a success.

There are loads of fantastic bloggers here in the Beat the Heat competition, which blog or blogs have you discovered through the challenge that you particularly enjoy? Show that person some love!

I'm not one to pick favorites. What I like best about these challenges is that everyone's blog is different - some people blog about weight loss, others art, others just life in general. I think everyone's blog has something interesting to offer.

What song makes you want to dance at the moment?

To be honest, I don't feel much like dancing. Between my job situation, my family situation, and now the boy situation, I've been mostly listening to the Magnetic Fields, the Velvet Underground, and Leonard Cohen - total Debbie Downer music. Sam introduced me to the Magnetic Fields and told me perfect because when you're sad, you don't always want cheerful pick-me-up music - you need to feel the sadness a little, totally experience it, and then dry your face and carry on. This is part of me feeling my feelings - three minutes spent bawling my eyes out to a sad song is three minutes I'm not binge eating.

17 comments:

Jillian said...

Mary--I am SO proud of you for handling your breakup without the "support" of food. Dating pitfalls and ups-and-downs were one thing that ALWAYS led me to binge, which in part is why I'm taking a break from the dating scene for a year (oh yeah--I'll be posting about that soon). If you're ever feeling sad, I'm a pretty good listener if you need to talk.

While I'm a little sad that you're cutting back on your posting, I know that you'll be doing what's best for you. I hope you still end up reading other blogs though--I'd miss you and your comments!

Shannon said...

Sorry about the break up with Matt, but I know you'll get through it okay, especially because it seems like you know it was the right thing to do for you.

I, totally, get needing to cut back on blogging. I used to feel like I had to blog every day, but it was so hard for me because I just don't have much to say some of the time, so now I skip days, and it feels less stressful.

Have a good week, Mary!

Amy said...

Sorry to hear about the break-up, but if I am anyone that will attest to this... is if it's not right in the beginning it never will be! I'm glad you chose to break it off instead of trying to make it work if it wasn't!

Listen to all the sad songs you can, but then switch to happy and make yourself dance and smile. Making yourself happy will make your brain follow suit and eventually you'll just feel happy. It's easy to fall into the break-up hole. When Stewart and I broke up, about 3 or 4 people really close to me had just done the same (it was weird). I watched some of them fall into the hole or do stupid things, while I just chose to be happy - it's funny to see where we all are now.

Rebecca said...

So sad to see you've broken it off with Matt, yet at the same time chuffed to pieces with you that you stuck to your principles (not everyone can when it comes to romance) and you haven't succumb to the bingeing. Relationships, romantic or otherwise, come and go, but you're stuck with your body for life. *hugs* from over the water hun xxx

Fat in Suburbia said...

Breaking up is always so hard regardless of who actually initiates it. It's great that you didn't resort to food through it all. I'll continue to read your blog updates even though they may be sporadic because you inspire me! Have a great week.

Caron said...

Love the comment "racing makes me feel like an athlete". I say that Jazzercize and Zumba make me feel like a "real dancer". Fun exercise too. :)

Christina said...

Awesome picture! I love the colors. I'll miss your daily posts, but I know it's much better to live life than to write about it. I'm sorry to hear about Matt. While I'm sure he was very nice, he's not worth a binge. Don't let him have that power over you. You know, I'm going to post about making crayon-Os later, and I think you should make some. They're super cheap to make, and they'll cheer you up a bit. :)

Tim said...

I feel like an idiot. I spent at least 5 minutes staring at the picture trying to work out what the blue things were, only to read the explaination right next to it! D'oh!!

Whenever you're starting to feel that you need binge, chuck your sportswear on and go for a run and I'll bet any money (well not too much because im broke) that you'll feel much better! :)

Stay strong, Mary.

Munchberry said...

I find most rules are BS. Especially ones you impose on yourself for no healthy reason.

I especially like breaking the self made rule of "I will stay with someone because they are willing to stay with me and I should be happy with that".

You are figuring out what works for Mary. Pretty darn awesome as you approach your first birthday.

Maia said...

So sorry to hear about the break up, but glad to hear you haven't turned to food so far! It's so hard not to turn back to it when it comes to dealing with the dating life, and you stayed strong! Good for you!!

Beautiful pic by the way.

timothy said...

omg sweetie i had had had to share this cause "i don't feel like dancing" is the best song to dance to! so play this and do it for me please! (smiles and blinks eyes fetchingly)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4H5I6y1Qvz0&ob=av2e
you're doin great and i'm sending good vibes your way as we speak! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

marisol said...

I am so proud of you for not binging given the circumstances. I know how easy it is to give into old habits but this just shows what a strong person you are becoming. You can conquer the world!

timothy said...

and i meant to say local honey is a GREAT way to avoid colds/allergies as the local pollen is in it and will build immunity!

Hyla said...

Sorry to hear about the breakup but I am so very proud of you for not bingeing, I totally would have done that too!

Joy said...

So sorry about the break up! That is tough!

I totally understand about blogging daily. Really you have to do what's best for you. Once you are refreshed you may want to start daily again. So glad you are not quitting it all together.

Keep up the great work and stay focused!

Kat said...

Sorry about the breakup, but good for you on staying strong and not giving on to a binge.

I love your goal to break some rules... I'm a rebel at heart wrapped in an accountant's body - dull on the outside, spicy in the centre!

I hope your blogging break helps you, I know there are times I find my regular schedule a challenge.

Amanda Cravens said...

I just found you and am very excited to start from the beginning and read your blog. First comes gym, then dinner then A small Loss blog. Expect lots of comments!